Tears of Joy
Now here we are
We let out all of our joy
They put us into shock
Now hear we that beat
We let the tears just roll
They watch as we scream out to them
Now here they’ve gone
We jump-up and down to the beat
They come out singing
Now hear this song
We sing it back
They jump and run basking in the glory
Now here it is as it comes to an end
We clap and cream
They are living in a dream
Now here we all are
We and They waiting for another day
To listen and play
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2 comments:
Eric,
I'm not really sure what this one is about. Maybe a concert? I'm really not sure.
My favorite line is: "We let the tears just roll". It seems unique and it makes you think about tears rolling, it's interesting word choice and I like that.
The line I think could use some work is: "They jump and run basking in the glory". It is longer than most of the other lines, and I think you could have better, more descriptive word choice because you did a good job of it in the rest of the poem.
I like the Walter Payton one better, and I really don't see any point in telling you why a second time, haha.
1. I think this is a great poem because I actaully feel what the poem is trying to show
2.Now hear this song
We sing it back
They jump and run basking in the glory
3.Now hear we that beat
We let the tears just roll
Maybe just change up the first line a little it's difficult to understand
4.I think this poem was the best of the two because I coudl relly feel the emotions and the images were in my head
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